I have learned to never ever ever burn your bridges. There is nothing to be gained by it, it never feels as good as it seems like it might, and it’s a REALLY small world.
So just be nice.
Category: Life
Courage
Jill shared this quote with me:
“Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgement that something else is more important than fear.” Ambrose Redmoon
Home Sweet Office
I have learned, again and again and again, that I love working at home.
I do love going into the office, seeing my friends and colleagues, and having that in-person connection during meetings. I also like the Big City and much of the commute. It’s still a kick to work in Boston.
But it’s hard to beat the added value of the extra five to six hours I get in my day when I work from home. Between the extra I can put in at work and the extra I can keep, it feels like winning an extra day in my day!
Lessons from Martin Luther King, Jr.
Martin Luther King, Jr. through the eyes of my Facebook friends on this day and then a story about my grandmother.
Patti posted: ”Hatred paralyzes life; love releases it. Hatred confuses life; love harmonizes it. Hatred darkens life; love illuminates it.” -MLK
Judy posted: “The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy.”– Martin Luther King, Jr.
Tim posted: “If a man doesn’t have a job or an income, he has neither life nor liberty nor the possibility for the pursuit of happiness. He merely exists.”
Cindy posted:””I have decided to stick with love. Hate is too great a burden to bear.” ~ Martin Luther King, Jr.
My Grandma Sara (1899-1998) claimed that she was right up there, standing with King during his “I have a dream” speech. Since Grandma was 4 feet 10 1/2 inches, she really would have to have been in front for this to be recorded in history. We have not seen it. Did she really mean she was literally up on the steps of the Lincoln Memorial? Or that she stood by him and his beliefs? We’ll never know, but we got the message just the same.
Sally recounted this story (first) in her blog: http://sallyandthecity.com/2011/01/18/music-monday-yes-we-can/
Learning to Fall
I have to start this one with a story from a long time ago. But maybe you were there? Leave a comment if you were.
Some time around 1970, my family went to Greenville, Maine for a ski vacation. Each of us kids got to bring a friend and we did the downhill ski thing, as did my dad. My mom, however, signed up for a cross-country ski lesson, which was a radical and brave thing for her, since she was not athletic or active in any way that I can remember.
At her first lesson, she told the instructor “I hear that you are going to teach us how to get up when we fall”. A friend had told her this, and it had given her great comfort and security in this adventure. “Sure,” he said, “When you fall, I’ll teach you how to get up.” “But I want to learn now”, my mother insisted. “We’ll get to that when you fall”, he repeated. Shlomp! Down she went! “OK” she said. “Teach me now”. And he did.
Fast forward to this day in 2011:
I went cross-country skiing with my sister, Lava, on my new fast skis. Fast. Really fast! I went down a Black Diamond hill that was not fast at all the last time we did it in starting-to-melt slow snow. But on this day, it was 12 degrees and the snow was fast and my skis are fast. All fast. I hit something – it may be the half-foot divot we looked back at (or maybe I made that one) or maybe it was something else, but I landed directly on my face. It hurt! I put my poles uphill and got myself up and kept skiing on this cold sunny day.
A while later, I did it again! I landed on my face again! It didn’t hurt as much, and I got up more easily.
The next times I fell (my new skis are fast, I tell you!) were farther apart, and each fall was easier and each time I popped up more quickly.
Like my mom, I learned how to fall, and I learned how to get up. Now I just need to learn how to ski a little better!
Bonus lesson: I learned how apt the term “face plant” is!
Here is the bottom part of the first hill. Yes, it looks like a bunny slope, and it would be on downhill skis, but on fast cold snow, it was a challenge on cross-country skis!
Eat
If I had a dollar for every time I’ve learned not to go into meetings (or any interactions with other people) hungry, then I could probably hire a personal chef who would follow me around and serve me food in time to avoid me being very cranky and obnoxious. And unhappy.
But I don’t have those dollars or that chef, so I need to learn, either once and for all, or (more likely) over and over again until it sticks, to EAT well before I get to starving, no matter how busy I am.
Why is this so hard to learn?
Big Obvious Lesson?
Donna learned:
“Do what you enjoy. The day goes by so much faster and we are too old to do something we don’t enjoy doing.”
Donna also said: “You may already have this one because it is so obvious.”
Tell me, is this obvious to you? Have you learned this?
Wait, did she say we are old?
Definition of Stress…
is when your gut says, ‘no way’ and your mouth says, ‘sure, how can I help you’?
From Michelle
Live in the Present
From Susan O*:
“I have learned lately that the best thing you can do for yourself is to live in the present. All the best laid plans can change in an instant. I am wondering how much time I have actually spent in the same room with myself.”
*this was on the About page but it deserves a day of its own!
Be Very Specific!
I am wrapping up a year of lessons with this gem from my cousin, Susan:
“Be careful what you wish for, because the wish genie is a literal bastard. For example, wishing for abundance in the new year did not mean I’d like to grow the biggest ass east of the Mississippi. Oops. Maybe if I write this here I’ll remember that being specific is so very important when setting goals…”
Jane's Lessons Learned 